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This article was rated TV4, suitable for a four year old, as in: you could read it like it's a fucking bedtime story. Let's increase the suitable age to at least sixty.

Anger is "the result of bullshit shoved in your face"; anger management is that victim's decision on how to handle the occasion. Anger has been the cause of many effects in history, most notably God's decision to invent animals the size of large, mutant animals (i.e. Godzilla, King Kong, T-Rex, yo mama!).

To be angry, one must have to want something to be changed, such as wanting the page to load (understandable), wanting to have not run that red light that you "didn't see" (also understandable), or wanting to enslave all of humanity and have a nuclear war with the martians (wait, what?).


People have only been angry since the onset of other people being angry; this statement can best be expressed with a complicate-as-hell formula:


Real life examples[]

  • Kid throws TV out of window, destroys neighbor's tree house; tree house debris fall and destroy neighbor's car. Summation: neighbor is angry.
  • Man drives up to McDonald's drive-thru, asks for Root Beer. Man punches out car door window. Noticing astonished drive-thru woman, man covers up incident by claiming he didn't know window was up since "it was so damn invisible". Summation: Woman across street, driving vehicle, is angry at light not changing.
  • Teen is drunk/high, driving with drunk/high friends, going approximately 175 mph. Teens crash into second floor of house. Summation: Owner (Asian) is angry.